30 May 2016

Movies: Unknown World (1951)

It's not all Bgrade and classic movies, but bank holiday mornings do seem to attract coffee and movies.
Bank Holiday Monday is kicking off with :
Unknown World (1951)
Dr Morley wants to save us from nuclear disaster! Fuck me, there's a female scientist, she's blonde and cute. All the others are elderly males. Morley wants to drill down into the earth to create a safe location for humanity. There's a lot in common with Jules Verne (and Rick Wakeman!) here. Society to Save Civilisation. Brilliant name that. He's using the Cyclotram, sadly no theremins  involved, yet.
Ahhh the 50's, they're smoking inside the Cyclotram, the female biochemist is making notes on people, ohhhh she's judgemental *gasp*. Cripes, even more rip from JV, they've found some notes from people who went that way in 1938! there's conflict in the team. Toxic Gas! Andy's dead. I know, I'm pretty cut up about it too. They've found an underground world, with waterfalls and everything. "Like a dream, or a nightmare".
Could have been worse, pottered along nicely, excessive sexism, all the usual 50s tick boxes.

29 May 2016

Movies: Savage Beach & Little Shop of Horrors

Savage Beach  (1989)
More Andy Sidaris. Opening with some guy doing vague moves with a sword on a beach, he's 'the warrior'. He's just bowed to a rock. Blondes in jeep with big hair? Check. Ohhh they've used other hot babes as a diversion, and are sneaking into the Delight Pineapple company, where they're putting a white powder inside pineapples !!! Well I never ! Just so they can arrest them, all the girls are narcotics agents!! Now all four are topless in a pool. As you do.
lots of car / motorbike chases, and shooting people. With pulsing 80s music underneath.
For some reason, they're searching for a sunken japanese warship. Everyone is looking very intense, and meaningful. Our blondes are flying through a thunderstorm, I've lost track why they're doing this, and they've been hit !! There are also generic asians looking for the gold, they're now doing karate. Ahh our blondes have crash-landed on the island where everyone else is heading.
I have fuck all idea what the plot was.

The Little Shop of Horrors 1960
A very early jack nicholson movie. With a great jazz soundtrack, and directed by Roger Corman, how could it fail...
More Jewish jokes than you shake a dreidel at. It's more snappy than the remake, but lots of the lines were kept between the two. This holds together really well, and maybe darker than the remake. Jack plays a pain obsessed chap, Wilber Force, visiting the dentist. And there's a Mrs Fishtwanger. More movies need a Mrs Fishtwanger.

8 May 2016

Movies: The Atomic Brain / A Bucket of Blood / House on Haunted Hill

Been a hellish couple of weeks, which may even get blogged about shortly. In the meantime here's some more movie reviews as I catch up on the significant backlog of flicks.

House on Haunted Hill 1959

black screen, screaming, much screaming, vincent price. floating heads. this starts well !

there’s a gathering at the house, a haunted house party, hosted by vincent’s wife. lots of moody dark shots. good stuff. mr and mrs vincent want to kill each other, good stuff there too.
the guests get a payout if they stay the night. so pretty standard scoobydoo set up ;)

fuck yeah there’s a theremin

7 strangers gather for a party, and we’re on the tour of the house describing the murders including stabbing and acid (this is led by the alcoholic of the group). 
“boy I’ve never seen so many doors” scintillating stuff, but oddly it worked.
some nice very creepy turns, really enjoying this.

mrs lawrence / price is now showing people their bedrooms. saucy ! she’s concerned mr lawrence/price is going to kill her. 
Vincent Price just said ‘It’s close to midnight’ !!!! OMFG. 
hysterical woman (tick) - offered sedative by psychiatrist. sigh.

oh noes. vincent’s wife is dead !! she’s been hung. the harmonium is now playing itself, except it sounds like a hammond organ. (or farfisa??)

A movie dedicated to eternal life. Explained, extensively, by voiceover. rich 80yo wants new body, pet scientist does the nasty business. And implied nasty with 80yo in a 20yo body.
Black and white, but lighting so bad it’s mostly black with hints of lighter grey.
There’s a problem, all he can produce are zombies. No brain. It’s a quandary all right!!
the evil Dr is using the hired help as his test subjects, our pick is th blonde is next to go - ooohhhh he’s carrying a black cat. The dude *is* evil. Oh hang on, voiceover has informed us the cat is being used as the brain transplant. 

A Bucket of Blood (1959) Roger Corman
A 1959 beat poet jazz influenced movie. It promised much, and I think I’ve seen it before, the Burroughs-like introduction continues throughout the movie. It’s a beat poet movie made by Roger Corman, so I guess it may actually have reflected the late 50s beat generation. Walter has made a cat, out of clay, only we know it’s made from his actual cat. This won’t end well for Walter needs to make more art works.

Walter is accused of being a drug dealer by an undercover cop - damn those square narcs, things spiral a bit and the cop ends up permanently poorly. I’m guessing his next artwork is about to happen… Everyone loves Walter's art, it's very lifelike. The critics love him too. It's all coming up mill house for Walter. Oh dear, except someone has seen through him, and is breaking his exhibits. poor Walter, exposed, just like Damian Hirst.
Enjoyable soundtrack too.

Because they're so good, here's the opening credits, and then as the movie is public domain, the full thing. I'm too good to you.

1 May 2016

Movies: The Amazing Transparent Man & Don't Answer the Phone

It's bank holiday weekend, and aside from cycling and wanderings, it's also movie time...

Yesterday saw me watch Don't Answer the Phone. Every cliche from 70s/80s cop shows was ticked. And even by the standards of the time, it was misogynistic to truly disturbing levels. Honestly, I can't think of one redeeming feature of this movie. Utter, almost unwatchable crap. Basically soft core torture porn, without the redeeming feature of being honest about what it was. I'm not usually too bothered by crap, but this one, yeah not good.

Today's viewing is a classic, the Amazing Transparent Man (1960). So far we've had exposition, a crazy doctor (with supposed german accent), an escaped criminal, casual 60's sexism, badly lit scenes and music more in keeping with 40/50s melodramas. So yep, this one is ticking far more of the boxes :) currently a guinea pig is being subjected to experiments, everyone is smiling maniacally, and the guinea pig has disappeared!!! shocking! Damn I love those 1960s science machines, dials, flip switches, electricity flowing everywhere, screw you PCR. I want bubbling beakers. A Nazi sub current is appears to be adding to the confusing mix. Our crazed guy has made himself invisible. everyone is very confused. Although people now want to make an invisible army. As you do.
At which point things became even more confusing. Things were resolved by blowing up the lab, which the ex-nazi scientist thought was the best way of resolving things.
We even ended with a straight to camera comment. Brilliant !