18 June 2012

Movies!!!

I've taken the week of work, ostensibly to support the Olympics stuff and to bugger off to some opera mid-week, but really it's for sanity.

So today, Monday, I'm watching movies - bgrades, lots of glorious bgrades.

First up is This Night I Will Possess Your Corpse, the second movie in the Coffin Joe boxset I picked up. I'm loving his stuff, dark, twisted, funny, cheesy but still good - and Coffin Joe has the best lines 'Man's immortality is through the fetus'. Currently a large number of tarantula spiders are climbing over a bunch of hot babes who may, depending on their suitability, become the unworthy host for Coffin Joe's offspring. Oh and there's a hunchback, who appears to have a football on his back.
I do like bgrade babes, none of your scrawny models, all curves. Great start to the day! Sipping Peoples Coffee and pondering moving from the couch to get some salmon bagels. 
But for all the bgrade-ness, Coffin Joe's movies do have real atmosphere, and CJ himself is quite impressive onscreen.
Oh things don't look too good for the babe castoffs, a large number of snakes have been loosed in their prison, so CJ is making sweet lovin' to the chosen unworthy to the sweet sounds of screams and death.

Oh dear, CJ's true love didn't work out. She loved (feared? I got confused) him, a sign of weakness apparently. And has left the scene. But wait, what's this, a new chick - exciting. Shock, horror, CJ is having his way with her! After a poker game.
There's a comedy dwarf jailor !!!

It's a bit long, but worked.

Osombie
How could a movie with it's premise of Osama Bin Laden coming back as a zombie fail? That's right, it can't.
Gung ho platoon (Nato) fighting zombies. Even better? cute blonde killing with a katana. FTW.
Theres emotional investment, one of the guys has been bitten. And one of his platoon has to kill him. Oh I almost cried.
And now a long exposition of how the zombies happened, and why the platoon is kinda lost.
"There's a fine line between dead, and not-so-dead"
The platoon finds an American chick, Dusty, who is hunting her brother (derek). Oohh another zombified platoon, so they shot him. Which caused emotional trauma to katana girl. She dealt with her issues by some slow-mo katana shapes. Brilliant.

It is also, apparently, essential as a Nato gunboy, to run around topless. And have unlimited ammo. It's like the Easy level on a FPS.

In all respects, this movie should be watched, it's fun, rocks along, and has zombies:


And now a break for some brunch.

B

1 comment:

michael said...

"It's like the Easy level on a FPS."

Perfect.