Movies : Silent Night, Bloody Night

Silent Night, Bloody Night (1972)

Not the best transfer, but an enjoyable romp. Not too much exposition, but enough so we're hammered with the fact the inherited house used to be an asylum. Which never ends well.
It doesn't drag too much, but it doesn't really engage either. It's a bit dull, and could do with more horror. Although it's implied, it's not particularly good.

Good way to fill in 80mins on a Friday afternoon, but nothing great.

Announcing a new series !! Explore Opera with Bruce!

I like opera. But I do tend to stick to what I know well (Wagner mainly, and the ring cycle in particular), so I think I need to push my boundaries out. Sure, I've got other opera's on the NAS, even Roger Water's Ca Ira is lying around on SACD (and yes, I like it), but I think I need to spin/watch more.
So, for my cultural edification, I'm going to explore an opera (plot, history, impact) then watch/listen to it - and if the plan works, make comments here.

I'm going to try to plan for one opera a month. I have fond memories on watching operas on a Sunday afternoon when I was a nipper, admittedly no-one else in the house liked opera so it never lasted (I grew up in a house of philistines, Gilbert & Sullivan was far more popular with them - I hate G&S), so as winter comes in later in the year I may try and move to a Sunday afternoon slot too.

I think I'll revisit the Bluray's I've already got, and I think I'm heading to some opera at the Proms, so that'll get a mention (I'm reasonably sure I booked some Bartok, who I also love).

me x

Movie: Gymkata

Todays quality viewing doesn't come the current pile of 12 movies on 3 DVDs for a fiver pile, rather a friend recommended this. In a "it's your kind of movie' way, based on err, well, most of the movie reviews I post here (in my defence, I have also watched The Revenant and Tale of Tales in the last few weeks...).
For a little context, the writer was my friends next door neighbour, and even cooler - this is his father.

So, Gymkata (1985).
Following the credits we've had some guy doing gymnastics, and now Ninjas! Fuck yeah. The guy is now being shot at by a Chuck Norris look alike, but with a bow and arrow. And now back to gymanastics (parallel bars, for those following at home). Our champion gymnast has been recruited by the US government, to prevent nuclear attack. I'm not making this up. Honest. They have to enter Palmistan, and 'play the game', which isn't, apparently, prostitution. Lots of other countries are also training their atheletes for this event. The tension is making my pants blow up. OMFG they've even got Palmistan's princess to help train him. She's promptly tied him up and smacked him over. Brilliant.

A generic looking asian is spouting nonsense aphorisms, with a hawk on his arm. It's so bad, I have to give you an image.
Following some very appalling acting/script Princess is now massaging him with a gaping blouse, and he rolls her over for a soft focus romantic shagfest [cut away]. Christ almighty.

After wandering through a very fake looking salt mine, we're in a souk / market. Princess is very excited. Everyone looks like Borat, and now one of his minions has been shot (with an arrow). So it's time for appalling kung fu !!! huzzah !!!!
He's also very keen on a red (white n blue) jumper, I suspect this acts a highly effective prophylactic. The generic foreign town they're running around looks more Italian (maybe Spanish?) than anything else. But he's doing martial gymnastics!! Oh thankfully he's also a superb shot with a gun. American action hero gymnasts, everything you need ...
And now a very long chase, gun fight, scene. Painfully long. There is no continuity in this movie, it lurches from scene to scene even worse than Harry Potter.
But we have ninja's. Again. so all is not lost. And now, for the race, they're running through cornfields, being chased by ninja's.  And now feasting on the day before the race. Plot is very confused. If it's there at all.
Not wanting to look to closely an continuity issues: but why is the princess Thai looking, and her father a very white chap?
More cornfields!!! And walking over pigs. Yes, pigs. I don't pretend to understand it either.

Movies: The Terror

As a title, yes it is apt given recent events. But no, this is the 1963 movie with Boris Karloff and Jack Nicholson. A young cavalry officer is lost on a beach (Nicholson), and follows an attractive (read, bosomy brunette) woman.
So far, there's been a lot of screeching strings, trying to build tension. Not sure it's worked, but eh. Our hero follows her into the water, is attacked by birds, and has just awakened in a castle while being looked after by an old crone. [tick and tick].

Our attractive woman has reappeared and we've just found out she's possessed. I also like that Nicholson's inability to act came from the start, the character is always Nicholson.
He's now met a Baron and questioning him about the young woman, who the Baron assures him doesn't exist.
"for a ghost, she's a very active woman"
Oh more ticks, graveyard castle, puffy shirts, and the baroness (cute babe) is still dead. But oddly active.
Jack's acting is still wooden, but he's challenging people. There's also an Eric. Yeah, Im confused too, but my bagel was nice. The Baron is getting an earful from Jack, for exposition purposes. The servant is very suspicious, followed by a lot of wandering around the castle by Jack. It's not riveting stuff by any stretch. Honestly, the football is better... In a predictable plot twist, Jack's trying it on with the ghost. My money's on her succumbing....I was right, wonder what I win? There's an awful lot of misty graveyard shots in this, and yet it's not a hammer horror. My mind, figuratively blown. The old crone appears to be controlling everything. "mesmerism, you fool" yes, it's scintillating stuff.
The soundtrack would make old Korngold happy, but it's by some dude Ronald Stein, who composed for a large number of b-grades I've seen. Classy.


Roger Corman, and F.F.Coppola.
Viewing has been brought to you by Beavertown Bloody 'ell, and Brewdog Black Hammer. Both highly recommended. Far more than the movie.

Movies: Unknown World (1951)

It's not all Bgrade and classic movies, but bank holiday mornings do seem to attract coffee and movies.
Bank Holiday Monday is kicking off with :

Unknown World (1951)
Dr Morley wants to save us from nuclear disaster! Fuck me, there's a female scientist, she's blonde and cute. All the others are elderly males. Morley wants to drill down into the earth to create a safe location for humanity. There's a lot in common with Jules Verne (and Rick Wakeman!) here. Society to Save Civilisation. Brilliant name that. He's using the Cyclotram, sadly no theremins  involved, yet.
Ahhh the 50's, they're smoking inside the Cyclotram, the female biochemist is making notes on people, ohhhh she's judgemental *gasp*. Cripes, even more rip from JV, they've found some notes from people who went that way in 1938! there's conflict in the team. Toxic Gas! Andy's dead. I know, I'm pretty cut up about it too. They've found an underground world, with waterfalls and everything. "Like a dream, or a nightmare".
Could have been worse, pottered along nicely, excessive sexism, all the usual 50s tick boxes.

Movies: Savage Beach & Little Shop of Horrors

Savage Beach  (1989)
More Andy Sidaris. Opening with some guy doing vague moves with a sword on a beach, he's 'the warrior'. He's just bowed to a rock. Blondes in jeep with big hair? Check. Ohhh they've used other hot babes as a diversion, and are sneaking into the Delight Pineapple company, where they're putting a white powder inside pineapples !!! Well I never ! Just so they can arrest them, all the girls are narcotics agents!! Now all four are topless in a pool. As you do.
lots of car / motorbike chases, and shooting people. With pulsing 80s music underneath.
For some reason, they're searching for a sunken japanese warship. Everyone is looking very intense, and meaningful. Our blondes are flying through a thunderstorm, I've lost track why they're doing this, and they've been hit !! There are also generic asians looking for the gold, they're now doing karate. Ahh our blondes have crash-landed on the island where everyone else is heading.
I have fuck all idea what the plot was.

The Little Shop of Horrors 1960
A very early jack nicholson movie. With a great jazz soundtrack, and directed by Roger Corman, how could it fail...
More Jewish jokes than you shake a dreidel at. It's more snappy than the remake, but lots of the lines were kept between the two. This holds together really well, and maybe darker than the remake. Jack plays a pain obsessed chap, Wilber Force, visiting the dentist. And there's a Mrs Fishtwanger. More movies need a Mrs Fishtwanger.

Movies: The Atomic Brain / A Bucket of Blood / House on Haunted Hill

Been a hellish couple of weeks, which may even get blogged about shortly. In the meantime here's some more movie reviews as I catch up on the significant backlog of flicks.

House on Haunted Hill 1959

black screen, screaming, much screaming, vincent price. floating heads. this starts well !

there’s a gathering at the house, a haunted house party, hosted by vincent’s wife. lots of moody dark shots. good stuff. mr and mrs vincent want to kill each other, good stuff there too.

the guests get a payout if they stay the night. so pretty standard scoobydoo set up ;)

fuck yeah there’s a theremin

7 strangers gather for a party, and we’re on the tour of the house describing the murders including stabbing and acid (this is led by the alcoholic of the group). 

“boy I’ve never seen so many doors” scintillating stuff, but oddly it worked.

some nice very creepy turns, really enjoying this.

mrs lawrence / price is now showing people their bedrooms. saucy ! she’s concerned mr lawrence/price is going to kill her. 

Vincent Price just said ‘It’s close to midnight’ !!!! OMFG. 

hysterical woman (tick) - offered sedative by psychiatrist. sigh.

oh noes. vincent’s wife is dead !! she’s been hung. the harmonium is now playing itself, except it sounds like a hammond organ. (or farfisa??)

The Atomic Brain (1963)

A movie dedicated to eternal life. Explained, extensively, by voiceover. rich 80yo wants new body, pet scientist does the nasty business. And implied nasty with 80yo in a 20yo body.

Black and white, but lighting so bad it’s mostly black with hints of lighter grey.

There’s a problem, all he can produce are zombies. No brain. It’s a quandary all right!!

the evil Dr is using the hired help as his test subjects, our pick is th blonde is next to go - ooohhhh he’s carrying a black cat. The dude *is* evil. Oh hang on, voiceover has informed us the cat is being used as the brain transplant. 

A Bucket of Blood (1959) Roger Corman

A 1959 beat poet jazz influenced movie. It promised much, and I think I’ve seen it before, the Burroughs-like introduction continues throughout the movie. It’s a beat poet movie made by Roger Corman, so I guess it may actually have reflected the late 50s beat generation. Walter has made a cat, out of clay, only we know it’s made from his actual cat. This won’t end well for Walter needs to make more art works.

Walter is accused of being a drug dealer by an undercover cop - damn those square narcs, things spiral a bit and the cop ends up permanently poorly. I’m guessing his next artwork is about to happen… Everyone loves Walter's art, it's very lifelike. The critics love him too. It's all coming up mill house for Walter. Oh dear, except someone has seen through him, and is breaking his exhibits. poor Walter, exposed, just like Damian Hirst.

Enjoyable soundtrack too.

Because they're so good, here's the opening credits, and then as the movie is public domain, the full thing. I'm too good to you.

Movies: The Amazing Transparent Man & Don't Answer the Phone

It's bank holiday weekend, and aside from cycling and wanderings, it's also movie time...

Yesterday saw me watch Don't Answer the Phone. Every cliche from 70s/80s cop shows was ticked. And even by the standards of the time, it was misogynistic to truly disturbing levels. Honestly, I can't think of one redeeming feature of this movie. Utter, almost unwatchable crap. Basically soft core torture porn, without the redeeming feature of being honest about what it was. I'm not usually too bothered by crap, but this one, yeah not good.

Today's viewing is a classic, the Amazing Transparent Man (1960). So far we've had exposition, a crazy doctor (with supposed german accent), an escaped criminal, casual 60's sexism, badly lit scenes and music more in keeping with 40/50s melodramas. So yep, this one is ticking far more of the boxes :) currently a guinea pig is being subjected to experiments, everyone is smiling maniacally, and the guinea pig has disappeared!!! shocking! Damn I love those 1960s science machines, dials, flip switches, electricity flowing everywhere, screw you PCR. I want bubbling beakers. A Nazi sub current is appears to be adding to the confusing mix. Our crazed guy has made himself invisible. everyone is very confused. Although people now want to make an invisible army. As you do.
At which point things became even more confusing. Things were resolved by blowing up the lab, which the ex-nazi scientist thought was the best way of resolving things.
We even ended with a straight to camera comment. Brilliant !

Movies: Ape Man & Point of Terror

Pottering around today, time for a couple of rubbish movies.

Ape Man (1943) with Bela Lugosi.

It's only 63mins, but feels longer. Not a great transfer, but Lugosi does manage to make the ape man sympathetic.
To be honest I kinda lost interest in this one, but the plot seemed to be scientist (Lugosi) accidentally turns himself into half man half ape, hirsute!!! and then decides an injection of spinal fluid will fix things, at which point a rampage occurs.

It has 4.3 on IMDB. Even as a b-grade fan, it was slow. More a 1-2 for me.





Point of Terror (1971)
Tony, our hero, is a nightclub singer who dreams of stardom. Tony doesn't have much time (not sure we find out why, although ironically the actor died in 1973 - when the movie was finally released, so y'know, foreshadowing). Tony commits adultery to hopefully get a recording contract. The movie was on a horror compilation, so far it's far more poor acting, slightly sleazy, and script writing of the worse kind. But yes, better than ape man. Awesome cheesy 70s soundtrack, in fact I've found you the opening credits... the full movie is also on youtube. More exposition than you can shake a stick at, brilliant! The woman who is going to make Tony's career, is married to a wheelchair bound ex-music executive, she apparently had her own life before marriage. Tony meanwhile is having nightmares of stabbing. We don't know why. Tony's adulterous manager has now knocked off her wheelchair bound husband, in a twist, he screamed in pain when she knocked his legs. He then drowned in a swimming pool, something the Para Olympics may contest as unlikely. This has made Tony an accessory to murder, apparently. Oh yeah, more 70s cheese music, and they're (tony's other woman) riding through forests on horses, following by snogging on the beach in the sunset. Oh right, this other woman is the managers daughter, tony has broken it off with the manager who took it poorly, and has gone for a flight down the hill - courtesy of Tony. She's looking a bit broken now.
Eh definitely not a horror, but OK background crap.

Movies: Andy Sidaris classy dude Pt 1

I splashed out on a 12 movie set, 4 quid. All by Andy Sidaris. He's known for boobs, bombs, and bullets (summarised on wiki as BBB) movies in the 80's, and in a sop to providing employment for the unemployable, he frequently used playboy bunnies in his movies. As I said, classy dude.

First up was: Malibu Express 

Had to wait 4min before the first boob shot. Un-fucking-believable.
The movie was carried by extensive exposition/voiceover but the lead (a PI called Cody). This was essential as the plot was loose, at best. Cody managed to sleep with pretty much every woman, all of whom seemed desperate to drop their pants/tops, and all of whom were enthusiastic adopters of the 'commando' approach to panty wearing.

A reoccurring motif was a drag race with some hill billies. For no obvious reason.
Cheesy doesn't begin to describe the movie. Much beer is required for viewing. The scenes are not so much linked as lurch from A to F, the linking appears to be boobs and Cody shagging.
Music: country and western




Hard Ticket to Hawaii
Empowered woman = pilot. Still obligatory boob shot tho' (huzzah!). There's also a very plastic looking snake, and some very Chicago/Cetera style music. Oh no, they've discovered the snake is contaminated!! But the women don't know!! They're sitting on the island, and they've found some contraband in a R/C helicopter, attacked by the smugglers they escape as they're highly trained operatives - and carry ninja stars. Yes. Ninja stars.
Oh knowing reference back to Malibu Express!! And the contraband is diamonds, the girls know that they'll be traced as they've got a distinctive plane. Sensible!!
The snake has, predictably, escaped - it doesn't move much, just sits there looking like plastic.
Woohoo, more exposition.
"you've got a great ass" "so do you pilgrim".
oh yeah, there's a weird kung fu subplot too. that one I've decided to avoid, it's too confusing.
I won't be spoiling the ending to say that things work out. I'm presuming you'd already guessed that. There is more coherence to the story than Malibu Express, which is saying very little.