17 February 2009

Slightly relaxed post

Right it's been awhile since I blogged about feck all, so with a glass of pinotage I approach the empty page with booze fuelled enthusiasm. I also have the Blackfield DVD on, which I like a lot. It's Steve Wilson exploring the shorter song format with Aviv Geffen (from the pseudo country - hahah there's the first wind-up, more to come!).
I've even had Jews try to explain the point of Israel and get confused halfway through. A simple pour quoi tends to bugger things a bit.

With that introduction, let's stick with music. I'm not a big fan of Led Zeppelin. Overblown, boring, over-hyped, and lacking creativity. I don't mind some of the blues stuff and some of the later things, but all in all, given me Deep Purple any day - a band seriously overlooked in the rawwwkkk stakes.
This view seems to raise concerns with many rock fans, apparently it's impossible to like rock music and not love LZ 4 - for those rest of you, that's the album with the dude carrying sticks and has 'that' song. The one about the lady who seems to have fuck all idea whats going on, and hasn't hired a gardener to chop her hedgerow. Although I believe Elton John volunteered to clean up the garden...unless its a refernece to the lady being particuarly hirsute. Now there's a word that needs to be used more. Apparently hirsute refers to women specifically, I didn't know that. So everytime some twat uses the word referring to a guy, rip them! DO IT !

It occurred to me the other day that everyone rips pop music lyrics, witness Ed Byrne's brilliant savagery of Alanis' feckin spoon song. So it's passe now, but when he first did, my god were we laughing. Only topped by Eddie Izzard's surreal exploration of digging cats. I should really track that down one day.


But apparently LZ are, as we all know, ROCK GODS and their lyrics are, although stupid, above reproach. Well my half empty bottle of pinotage says, bugger that buddy!
Randomly choosing a song, I've ended up with:

The Battle Of Evermore
Queen of Light took her bow, And then she turned to go,
The Prince of Peace embraced the gloom, And walked the night alone.
>>The Queen left, leaving the Prince alone (shades of Freud?)

Oh, dance in the dark of night, Sing to the morning light.
The dark Lord rides in force tonight, And time will tell us all.
>>You're drunk, dance stupidly at night. Sober in the morning will make you moan/LZ apparently liked LOTR, and the last sentence makes no sense.

Oh, throw down your plow and hoe, Rest not to lock your homes.
Side by side we wait the might of the darkest of them all.
>>Quick run away, so we can steal your stuff. You'll probably die.

I hear the horses' thunder down in the valley blow,
I'm waiting for the angels of Avalon, waiting for the eastern glow.
>>Look to the East for I will come (actually it was West wasn't it? LOTR geeks?) otherwise, nibble some magic mushrooms or blow.

The apples of the valley hold, The seeds of happiness,
The ground is rich from tender care, Repay, do not forget, no, no.
Dance in the dark of night, sing to the morning light.
>>Find ye some cider. Get drunk, dance at night, I've already told you that.

The apples turn to brown and black, The tyrant's face is red.
>>The tyrant, or bourgoisie, is upset his profit crop has gone off as you buggered off to eat mushrooms

Oh the war is common cry, Pick up you swords and fly.
The sky is filled with good and bad that mortals never know.
>>There's crap in the air. You're too thick to understand.

Oh, well, the night is long the beads of time pass slow,
Tired eyes on the sunrise, waiting for the eastern glow.
>>Where TF is that feckin army, Gandalf lied. Stupid hat wearing twat.

The pain of war cannot exceed the woe of aftermath,
The drums will shake the castle wall, the ring wraiths ride in black, Ride on.
>>Oh dear god, it is a LOTR reference. Damn you LZ ! Go feck a hobbit.

Sing as you raise your bow, shoot straighter than before.
No comfort has the fire at night that lights the face so cold.
>>We're all fucked, so if you sing the opposition can work out where we are. Cunning eh?!

Oh dance in the dark of night, Sing to the morning light.
The magic runes are writ in gold to bring the balance back. Bring it back.
>>Drink some more. Find some writing in the bottle.

At last the sun is shining, The clouds of blue roll by,
With flames from the dragon of darkness, the sunlight blinds his eyes.
>>And so it comes to pass we all die from the dragon. Lay of the hard drugs kids.

Love, me.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Doesn't like the Zeps. But likes Oasis.

You're a strange stange bird, Mr Bruce.

Anonymous said...

Interesting that this comes after 1/2 a bottle of pinotage. I'm curious to know what happens with a whole bottle. :) J