More 80s madness, this time Voyage of the Rock Aliens. It's opening with music that at the time was probably futuristic, there's lots of synth and vocoder madness, and now sounds gorgeously dated, there's also a spaceship, so you know they're aliens, shaped like a Gibson Flying V guitar (see, look at my music knowledge!).
Synth Drum Madness!!! Sorry, got a bit emo there. Ahhh there's the love interest, and the main black guy leader of the black gang (he looks a dead ringer for Michael Jackson Thriller era), and the first musical number. It's going to be West Side Synth! Musically, position yourself halfway between Giorgio Morodor and Jim Steinman, and you're roughly there (even if it's a very very bad place). More cheese than a Fromagerie on crack. Black guy (oh did I mention he's now hooked up with the white chick? already?!) sounds like Leo Sayer, and everyones on motorbikes.
The RockAlien's spaceship is driven by keyboards! It's Wakemania! Just like henmania, but lasts longer, much much longer. I have to admit, the dance scenes are very cool, and refreshingly odd. I mean, this lovely pop song (Real Love), now has a monster tentacle dancing. Out of the lake. I don't pretend to understand either.
The RockAliens have now arrived on earth, in a phone box. Wonder where that idea came from? Their outfit is pink, with black highlights, and all of them have those weird glasses that weird guy in Star Trek (?Data?) wore. The head alien has just fallen for the girl, he exploded with ecstasy. Literally. It's just like molecular biology, they printed him out, ran him through a machine and now he's inflating back to normal, and now he's dancing on a tractor to a song called 'Combine Man'. The Wurzels were never that cool. And OMFG, there's a key-tar!!!!! Deep breaths, I can deal, I can.
There's a sexual response stimulator, it appears to be malfunctioning. Nice touch that.
And badda-bing, the lead chick is going to sing with the aliens in the local talent quest. Booyar. The next song, has a cow in it, and synth madness to the point even Starship would be going, 'dudes, let's just settle here'. Heehee, the local school is called 'heidi high', and the mental patients have bought an arsenal from the local gun shop leading to the quote 'fine example of our right to bear arms', that's from the sheriff.
As expected, it's come down to a band-off. The Aliens have key-tar's, so my money will always be on them. I would like to point out Pia Zadora looked pretty damn good in this, and oddly this didn't have a lot to do with finding the movie. The tentacle becomes important much later. For no readily explained reason, but thats fine, and not much of a surprise.
I think the big question is, why were Grease and Flashdance such hits, and this wasn't? The World is highly unfair.
As you've probably gathered, I liked this movie, a lot. So let's give it a 4.5/5-it lost a little in the second third, but I should also point out, I don't like musicals- but this was excellent.